Saturday, August 11, 2012

Wanderer, Worshiper, Lover of Leaving

We UUs, we have some funny hymns; it's just a thing. Many of these hymns I love dearly and will get stuck in my head for hours on end. Some, I picture singing with our youth choir and signing along to our words. Several, I can feel my mother swaying beside me as I hum. And different songs and phrases strike me more powerfully at different times. Recently, I've had this stanza running through my mind:

Come, come whoever you are,
Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving.
Ours is no caravan of despair,
Come, yet again, come.

I wrote a poem inspired by this song many years ago in which I chose to dichotomize those three positions as completely separate people: the wanderer, who doesn't know what they're looking for but searches constantly; the worshiper, who is decidedly comfortable with what they believe; and the lover of leaving, who rushes through life in an attempt not to deal with finding or practicing the answers. But as I grow into a new understanding of identity, I begin to realize that most UUs, by the very nature of the religion, are a vastly complex combination of these identities. I reject traditional scripture and worship as to rigid in favor of endeavoring on my own search, but I search in the structured environment provided to me by my religious community, and I realize that while I idly search I am avoiding being tied down to any particular beliefs. I find both fault and strength in all three personas, but I have yet to decide whether, when the three are combined they are collectively more faulty or more strong. 

1 comment:

  1. running through my mind now!