The Fall

I suppose this happens remarkably frequently, whether I like it or not, but I am mesmerized, shockes, compelled, and horrified every time someone I have idolized has a, so-called, fall from grace. The first time I really noticed it was when one of my best friends first told me he had had sex (I think he was sixteen at the time), and then proceeded to tell me how much sex he had: a lot. Quite honestly, I don't really care how much sex anyone is having as long as they feel good about what they're doing and the people that they are engaging with feel mutually, and to his credit, this particular friend was having sex for perfectly fine reasons with a perfectly willing accomplice. And even knowing all that, it still bothered me. I'd spent so much of my life looking up to him, it was hard to imagine a world where he was making decisions I didn't agree with and wouldn't follow. Don't get me wrong, I have no issue with my friend himself, it was more that the circumstance appalled me. It was right up there with realizing mommy can't always fix everything (although I've come full circle on that and, as I'm about to turn eighteen, I'm confident mommy can come pretty damn close to fixing everything). Anyway, I recently encountered another fall from grace. My entire youth group has been madly in love with one of our advisors since before I can remember. He's the coolest guy ever with an insana amount of enthusiasm and an even insaner commitment to us. A few month ago he went into the hospital for complications related to his diabetes. More recently I have come to find out that, these "complications" have a lot more to do with alcohol abuse and depression than they do diabestes. And so another falls like Lucifer.